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Joyce Haines- Loved Mother And Grandmother

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A tribute byCharlotte Clegg

My grandmother was the light of a party and had the most infectious smile.

Joyce Haines was born on the 6th of February 1944 and was later adopted into a loving family. She has two children, the oldest, Philip Haines, born on 20th March 1966. Her daughter, Andrea Haines, born on 11th January 1968. Joyce adored her children dearly and later on her daughter(my mother) would give her three grandchildren. Her eldest grandaughter, Kirsty Clegg, 27, her middle grandaughter, Charlotte Clegg, 18 and her only grandson, Ben Clegg, 16.

Joyce was married to Bernard Haines, but sadly he lost his life at sea whilst she was heavily pregnant with their daughter, Andrea. Later on, she went onto meet a wonderful man called Vincent or as she called him, Mick. She did not remarry, but spent the rest of his life with him happily and formed some of the memories I remember so fondly.

Joyce would spend almost every day with her daughter, Andrea. They would sit over endless cups of tea and biscuits, smiling and reminiscing. They were inseparable, some would say more like sisters or best friends. They did everything together; joined the gym, trips out, their weekly shop, spending time with the locals. Neither of them went a day without a smile spread across their faces and my nan kept her spirits high and her smile wide until her very last moments.

Some of my fondest moments with her would be Friday nights, coming home from school, greeted by beans on toast, jelly and ice cream with FRO7 on in the background. Our heart to hearts and the laughter we shared. We were a team, our battles were something we helped each other with. We became each others strengths and when I lost her, I felt like I had become nothing.

She loved others with so much of her heart, she always thought of others and never worried about herself. Everyone who knew her, loved her spirit and fight. She was quite the joker and there was never a dull moment with her around. She could cheer you up when you were in the worst of places and you would feel like nothing was ever wrong. Christmasses and birthdays were her favourite, the camera would be the first thing out and the oven would be heating up in preparation for her apple crumbles and her fruit tarts. She loved to bake and cook, and our final christmas with her was at her bungalow, surrounded by so much food, music, gifts and happiness. I will forever cherish her better moments, as I'm sure we all will.

In March/April of 2016, my nan sat us down and told us she had an inoperable tumour on her pancreas but that she could try tackling it with chemotherapy and radiotherapy. She was so positive but she herself knew the real battle she was facing as the rest of us, did not. She started chemotherapy almost instantly but ended up with blood poisoning, meaning a few blood transfusions and a long hospital stay. She then picked up again over the summer before starting a course of radiotherapy over 28 days.

The last we knew, her cancer was still a stage 3 pancreatic adenocarcinoma and this was the christmas of 2016. In February 2017, she had severe jaundice after issues with her liver, meaning she had to have a stent fitted. She was later let out after two weeks. In March 2017, she had another CT scan which showed she was now terminal. Her sight had worsened and it became to the point where she could no longer live at home.

She spent her final weeks at home being cared for through carers but mostly through her daughter, Andrea and her grandaughter, Charlotte. She would rely on us to help her 24/7 but we never minded that as our love for her outweighed everything.

Surrounded by her son, her daughter, her grandchildren and her best friend, Chris- Joyce later passed away peacefully on the 10th July 2017 at 7:30am. She was an amazing woman who would do anything for those she cared for. I can't describe the lengths of which she will be missed but there certainly is a void which can't be filled.

You were the bestest friend me and mother could ever ask for, and as pained as I am to have lost you, I am relieved you are no longer suffering.
She will be missed by Philip, Andrea, Kirsty, Charlotte, Ben, Chris and to all that knew and loved her. She will always be in our hearts and our memories.
May you rest in peace, My Darling Grandmother.
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